Offtopic Forum

So I have been working on a construction site this summer, and I heard an expression today that got me thinking. Normally, when you see an attractive member of the opposite sex, you say something like: "Damn, he/she is hot." or "I would enjoy having sexual intercourse with that person." Having said that, any other people in proximity are free to view the subject of your interest and agree/disagree, or whatever. I never thought about it before, but how you express this feeling is pretty important. I was walking across the parking lot with a redneck coworker of mine, and upon seeing the girl working at the snack truck, he turned to me and said the following:

"Look at the shitter on that critter!"

Which, for some reason, just didn't pique my interest in the same way a more traditional expression might of. In fact, I had trouble understanding how someone could equate a "shitter" with the attractive roundness of a well toned female posterior. Anyway, without belaboring the point, anyone else heard any expressions that just strike you as weird? I have a couple more, this redneck guy alone is a treasure trove of bizarre sayings, I'm pretty sure he makes them up on the spot.

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All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it.
- H. L. Mencken

When a guy says about a girl "Damn, I'll bet that girl gives good head" This doesn't really make sense to me considering it is the guy who is giving the head of his penis to the girl, not the other way around. Therefore, the guy should give head, not the girl.

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haha...I work in the construction business as well and i definitely hear some odd/funny sayings, most of which are in spanish and when i receive the translation it's usually funny as hell or it doesn't even make sense. anyways i heard one the other day that was pretty funny, one of my painters likes to bs and he's telling one of his stories about his lady friends and how he hooked up with a girl and his sister as he began giving details my old school country handyman says

"Maaaan, you lying like a no-legged dog!"


i dont know about you but i was

Yeah I have definitely run into some hilarious Spanish guys, the stuff they say is pretty outrageous. This isn't exactly an expression, but there is one dude on my job site who calls himself grapestar, we don't know who it actually is, and he will go around painting these super lewd comments in Spanish on the walls and draw dirty pictures next to them, like stick figures with huge boobs and full anatomy. Everyday I have to go around with a can of spray paint and cover up his "art" and while I do it there are always like 10 guys around laughing their asses off about grapestar's newest handiwork. I'll look around today and see if I can get some examples.

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All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it.
- H. L. Mencken

"he beat him with a stick like you'd beat a badger"


My Nan talking about a guy who beat a man to death with a walking stick. I lol'd so hard.

I think my favorite ridiculous expression I have heard lately came from a guy with the worst hangover ever. He said "I feel like a coyote sh*t off a cliff." That's a really southern phrases.

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I haven't heard any of these but am definitely laughing at them now that I have. I'm looking forward to hearing what other sayings you guys come up with.

One from me... Does anyone know what a "gumband" Is? In Pittsburgh PA it's a rubberband LOL